I, Too, Use Ozempic, But Not For Diabetes OR Weight Loss

I just like to eat it.

The diabetes drug Ozempic has been in the news lately because celebrities have been using it for weight loss, making it far less readily available for the diabetes patients who rely on it. Apparently the celebrities are even having ‘Ozempic Parties’ where they all sit around, inject the drug, and talk about how neat it is to be famous (I’m speculating a bit here). 

I’d like to take this time to formally apologize because when it comes to this issue, I am a part of the problem rather than the solution. You see, Ozempic is a diabetes medication, a weight loss method, but it also happens to taste fucking delicious.

Ozempic sort of has an umami flavor which makes it pair nicely with wine that is low in tannin but relatively high in acidity. Sometimes I’ll even just squirt some Ozempic on a cracker like cheez wiz.

I know that what I am doing is wrong, but I will not be stopping anytime soon.