400 Days Of Toilet Read

I’ve been writing this newsletter every single day for 400 days. Let’s put that into perspective.

I have written a new piece of comedic content for this newsletter every single day since December 24th, 2021. That’s 400 days! In order to commemorate Day 400, I’ve decided to contextualize this feat so I can appreciate it more.

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400 Days Is…

• 393 days longer than I lasted on my last diet (7 days).

• 382 days longer than the Thai soccer team spent relaxing in their underground cave (18 days).

• 35 days longer than a One-Year-Warranty (365 days).

• 328 days longer than the marriage between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries (72 days).

• 356 days longer than Liz Truss served as Prime Minister of the U.K. (44 days).

• Longer than the shelf life of peanut butter (6-9 months unopened).

• 55 days longer than the average gestation period of an alpaca (345 days).

• Longer than Brittney Griner spent detained in Russia (10 months).

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While I am incredibly proud of myself and grateful that I began this journey 400 days ago, I am just as appreciative, if not more, for each and every one of you who has read, shared, liked, commented, fed me topic ideas, advised me on which of my potential ideas were stupid, complimented me on one of my pieces, told your friends about the newsletter, and supported me in any way throughout this journey.

I’m doing this for myself, when all is said and done, but to know that this newsletter provides the people who read it with some level of joy, whether it’s once a day, once a week, once a month, or once every 400 days, is an incredibly special feeling.

Thank you.